Learning Korean

I'm learning Korean with Rosetta Stone. It's made the Korean language extremely accessible to me. Korean is really much easier than one might think. Here's a brief description of my family:

저희 가족이에요.

This is my family.

저희 아버지 세요.

This is my Dad.

저희 어머니 세요.

This is my Mom.

저는 형 두명 이에요.

I have two older brothers.

저는 누나 새 명이에요.

I have three older sisters.

저는 여동생 두명이에요.

I have two younger sisters.

저는 우유를 마서요.

I drink milk.

Mothers Day Sacrament Meeting Talk

On the wall next to my dining table hangs a beautiful portrait of my mother playing the violin. It was painted by my brother Kirk during the early stages of his art career and education. The portrait is painted so that the viewer seems to be looking from the side and slightly from behind my mother, whose face radiates a serene reverence and joy from the beauty of the melody emanating from her instrument.

Disclaimer: The violin is merely a tradition in my family. It is not necessary for all mothers to play the violin. However, I would like to share some thoughts today, some about mothers, and others addressed to mothers. On the way, I might use the violin as a symbol of what mothers and parenthood are all about.

I. The importance of mothers

The importance of mothers in God’s divine plan

We lived before we came to this earth. We were the spirit Children of our Heavenly Father, who created us in His image, taught us, and gave us the freedom to walk in his ways. To help us become more like Him, he prepared a plan, by which we could all come to Earth to gain a physical body and learn from our own experience. The role of mothers in bringing God’s children to Earth is more than obvious.

President N. Eldon Tanner taught, “The whole purpose of the creation of the earth was to provide a dwelling place where the spirit children of God might come and be clothed in mortal bodies and, by keeping their second estate, prepare themselves for salvation and exaltation. The whole purpose of the mission of Jesus Christ was to make possible the immortality and eternal life of man. The whole purpose of mothers and fathers should be to live worthy of this blessing and to assist God the Father and his son Jesus Christ in their work. No greater honor could be given to woman than to assist in this divine plan, and I wish to say without equivocation that a woman will find greater satisfaction and joy and make a greater contribution to mankind by being a wise and worthy mother raising good children than she could make in any other vocation.”[1]

The closing words of the Old Testament, written by Malachi, state:

“Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the Lord:

And he shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children and the heart of the children to their fathers, lest I come and smite the earth with a curse.”

Heavenly Father’s divine purpose for the family is for it to serve as a basis on earth and continue its existence in heaven. Mother-child relationships are not for this life alone, but are intended to last beyond this life into eternity. Without this binding of generations together and the perpetuation of the family beyond the grave, the creation of the Earth would have been a waste. Logically, the vast beauties of the universe were created merely as an ancillary to motherhood and not the other way around.

The importance of mothers in the life of the child

Children reap numberless benefits from loving mothers. Daughters often become like their mothers. Sons often seek for wives that in some way display characteristics similar to those of their mothers. My sister Becky relates: “I think it is funny to realize that I have turned into my mother. All the things I said I'd never do, I do INTENTIONALLY.”

Children draw great personal security and strength from both parents. The Lamanite young men in the armies of Helaman developed great faith that led them through dangerous times. While other Nephite warriors were perishing, these young men stood firm and undaunted. “…yea, and even according to their faith it was done unto them; and [Helaman] did remember the words which they said unto [him] that their mothers had taught them.”[2]

Sharon Darling, president & founder of the National Center for Family Literacy said, “Those fond times spent in a rocking chair reading with your mom are more than memories. They are critical for children’s future academic success. That’s right, your performance on tests and in school is greatly influenced by your mother’s education level and involvement in your schooling.”

“Many moms wonder what they can do to help their children be successful in school. The answer is surprisingly simple. Many of the things parents do with their children as they work, play, read and talk together have an impact on the skills needed to become a confident and competent student. Singing songs, making up silly rhymes, talking about what you see, pointing out letters and words in the environment and reading together are just a few activities parents can do.”[3]

Mothers play a crucial role in helping their daughters become mothers. My sister Emily’s second son came two months early. She relates:

“The night Adam was born was pretty traumatic. It was an emergency surgery to be followed by a difficult and stressful recovery. The surgery happened around midnight and I spent the entire night desperately wanting to call my mom. (I think in my highly-drugged state I even remember wanting to call her "mommy" a few times.) I waited until 8:00 am EST to call, so I wouldn't be waking mom and dad up in the middle of the night. I felt so much better when I finally got her on the phone. I think later she even said I don't have to wait until 6:00am to call next time. … she promptly ordered her plane ticket and made the necessary adjustments to her plans for the next week. She arrived at my door only 5 minutes after I came home from the hospital. She was there when I needed her the most.”

From my sister Ellen: “A little over a year ago, Mom gave me some very sudden advice about one of my children and completely took me by surprise. I called her the next day so that we could discuss the matter further in private, and I will never forget that phone call. Not only did we spend longer on the phone than I have ever talked to her in my life before, but it put so many things into perspective for me that I hadn't ever understood before and am only beginning to understand now. Also, I've come to realize that she has been putting a whole lot of thought and prayer and seeking for inspiration into this whole family thing all the way along. How did she make it look so easy when we were younger?”

The importance of mothers in the church and nation

President Herbert Hoover gave this incentive: “If we could have but one generation of properly born, trained, educated and healthy children, a thousand other problems of government would vanish. We would assure ourselves of healthier minds, more vigorous bodies, to direct the energies of our nation to greater heights of achievement.”[4]

Brigham Young taught: “…mothers are the machinery that gives zest to the whole man, and guide the destinies and lives of men upon the earth … The mothers are the moving instruments in the hands of Providence to guide the destinies of nations. Let the mothers of any nation teach their children not to make war, the children would grow up and never enter into it.”[5]

II. Things mothers can do to nurture and to lead more joyful, effective lives

1. Emulate divine attributes

Though I’m not sure how it works, most mothers seem to already be all-knowing and all-seeing. All parents would do well, however, to run their homes parallel to the way Heavenly Father runs His divine plan: with justice and mercy.

Don’t be afraid to establish clearly defined laws within your home. “… if there was no law given against sin men would not be afraid to sin.”[6] You must have rules, but do not stop at merely making up rules. Be sure to establish pre-determined consequences for both the obeying and the disobeying of family laws. By doing so, you have created an environment in which your children can make use of their agency, just as God did when He created Adam and Eve and gave them commandments and consequences for disobeying them. Imagine a home where there is no law. What kind of nurturing could happen there? “And if there was no law given, if men sinned what could justice do, or mercy either, for they would have no claim upon the creature? But there is a law given, and a punishment affixed, and a repentance granted; which repentance, mercy claimeth; otherwise, justice claimeth the creature and executeth the law, and the law inflicteth the punishment; if not so, the works of justice would be destroyed, and God would cease to be god.”[7] One might paraphrase, “And if there was no law given … the works of justice would be destroyed, and Mom would cease to be Mom.”

A law without clear consequences is merely a whim, or a threat. Be fair to your children by clearly communicating rules and expectations in advance. “Where there is no law … what could justice do?” Even Heavenly Father pardons those that have not the law given unto them.

Find ways to establish just laws. Then help your children keep them, but remember to be a “just [Mom], and a merciful [Mom] also.”

2. Trust God while holding to His Word

There is no better source for reading up on God’s attributes than the Scriptures. Again from Alma: “For behold, it is as easy to give heed to the word of Christ, which will point to you a straight course to eternal bliss, as it was for our fathers to give heed to this compass, which would point unto them a straight course to the promised land.

“And now I say, is there not a type in this thing? For just as surely as this director did bring our fathers, by following its course, to the promised land, shall the words of Christ, if we follow their course, carry us beyond this vale of sorrow into a far better land of promise.”

3. Exemplify Obedience

Again from the account of the armies of Helaman, “Yea, and they did obey and observe to perform every word of command with exactness;” Such exactness is not taught by word only, but by example. The mothers of these young men could have taught their sons such strict obedience only by being obedient themselves.

Once, as my family sat around the dinner table, the conversation turned to some friends of ours that had left their church and removed their temple garments. My mom said with an air of caution: “Don’t people realize what kind of peril they put themselves in?” She may not remember this experience, but it made such an impression on my mind that I have never forgotten it. I shall always remember how dedicated my mother is to her temple covenants.

4. Seek conversion

King Benjamin taught his people to “remember, and always retain in remembrance, the greatness of God, and your own nothingness, and his goodness and long-suffering towards you, unworthy creatures, and humble yourselves even in the depths of humility, calling on the name of the Lord daily, and standing steadfastly in the faith of that which is to come, which was spoken by the mouth of the angel.

“And behold, I say unto you that if ye do this ye shall always rejoice, and be filled with the love of God, and always retain a remission of your sins; and ye shall grow in the knowledge of the glory of him that created you, or in the knowledge of that which is just and true.

“And ye will not suffer your children that they go hungry, or naked; neither will ye suffer that they transgress the laws of God, and fight and quarrel one with another, and serve the devil, who is the master of sin, or who is the evil spirit which hath been spoken of by our fathers, he being an enemy to all righteousness.

“But ye will teach them to walk in the ways of truth and soberness; ye will teach them to love one another, and to serve one another.” My sister Angie had the recent insight that seeking conversion and humbling oneself before God will naturally lead parents to do all the rest of these things. Putting forth so much effort into the teaching and rearing of children may seem daunting, but when we humble ourselves first and seek to be converted, the rest will come. Diligent parenting is a natural outgrowth of conversion to the gospel of Jesus Christ. For as Jesus Christ taught Peter, “When thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren.” Another paraphrase: “When thou art converted, strengthen thy children.”

5. Point children to Christ

Build family traditions that point your children to the Savior.

“For we labor diligently to write, to persuade our children, and also our brethren, to believe in Christ, and to be reconciled to God; … And we talk of Christ, we rejoice in Christ, we preach of Christ, we prophesy of Christ, and we write according to our prophecies, that our children may know to what source they may look for a remission of their sins.”[8]

When my siblings and I were growing up, we pulled out a wooden manger after Thanksgiving and left it out for the Christmas season. A bag of straw remained hidden in a nearby cupboard. Each time we did a good deed for someone else, usually in secret, we removed a piece of straw from the bag and placed it in the manger. Our goal was to ensure that the manger was full enough for baby Jesus when He arrived. It remained vacant until Christmas, when the baby Jesus, represented by a small doll wrapped in swaddling clothes, was placed by my mother in the manger in time for Christmas morning. Before opening any presents, before the rush and awkward juvenile tension of Christmas began, we sang Christmas carols together, made our procession to the manger, and quietly paused to behold the newborn Son of God reverently resting in the manger. My, what a clever mother I had. Not only did she enjoy the benefits of children serving one another during the Christmas season, but she instilled in us at a very early age a testimony of the divinity of Jesus Christ and His mission to the Earth.

6. Keep perspective

Again, from my sister Becky: “A couple of years ago, Mom's violin was sitting in it's case on the shelf where it goes. One of my little boys who shall remain nameless Kendall walked passed, [and] barely touched it. The lid fell down and cracked the instrument. I felt terrible mostly due to the fact that I had NO money to be able to repair it. Mom went ahead and got it fixed and NEVER SAID A WORD. I didn't dare ask about it, because I was afraid of hearing the answer. Finally I got up the nerve to ask her what it had cost ($800). I was sick over it, but she pointed out that accidents happen and it was just a thing, less important than the person.

“We have a lot of nice instruments in our families. We could try to keep them all in pristine condition and they would sit on a shelf and never be touched...except by adults...still not foolproof...or we can use them for what they're intended.”

Becky continues: “Although [Mom] was never satisfied with the state of the house (when we were growing up), she never let that worry get in the way of the time she spent developing children. She could have been so consumed with the day-to-day up-keep that she might not have ever gotten to the truly important things. As [my husband’s] mom says, "Children are only yours for a short time. The house will always need to be cleaned."

In the Sermon on the Mount, the Savior taught, “Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.” He also taught, “Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal:

“But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal:

“For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.”[9]

---

[1] N. Eldon Tanner, No Greater Honor: The Woman’s Role. New Era. January, 1977.

[2] Alma 57:20-21

[3] National Center for Family Literacy (NCFL). Mothers Can Improve Children’s Academic Success by Reading. April 2008. http://www.newswise.com/articles/view/539997/

[4] Quoted by President David O. McKay, Conference Report, April 1931, pp. 79–80.

[5] (DBY, 199–200)

[6] Alma 42:20

[7] Alma 40:22

[8] 2 Nephi 25:23,26

[9] Matthew 6:19-21

Moscow, Russia - October, 2007

Well, I’m way behind on reporting on my travels … way behind as in, I haven’t reported on last year, so I’d better catch up.

Aside of my weightlifting ventures to exotic places like … Johnson City, Tennessee, the biggest trip that I took in 2007 was to Moscow, Russia, where I gave a presentation on the Rosetta Stone Russian product at a conference hosted by the Russian State University for the Humanities (Российский Государственный Гуманитарный Университет). It was a wonderful experience because:

- I got to travel to Russia for the first time since my mission.

- I gained valuable professional experience.

- I met a lot of wonderful people whose focus is to teach Russian either as a foreign or second language. Many of these people were from the Moscow area, but many were from other parts of the Russian Federation or other countries, like Germany, Italy, and South Korea.

The opportunity resulted from collaborating on the Rosetta Stone Russian product with Nyusya Milman-Miller, professor of Russian Language and Literature at Virginia Tech. She had a connection with the RSL program at RSUH, who in turn invited me to come present at their conference.

So, I applied for a visa, packed my bags, and went on a very long plane ride.

The first thing that I have to say about visiting Russia not as a missionary is that it’s weird. You’re not wearing a shirt and tie, so not everyone is staring at you. You don’t need to feel paranoid that the police are going to stop you at any minute or that thugs are going to give you trouble.

On the plane, I sat next to a pretty cool kid named Radik, in his early twenties, married, lives in Virginia. Flew into Sheremetievo on Saturday morning and was greeted by Elena from RSUH. We got into a cab, I sat in the front, buckled up, and Elena exclaimed to the driver, “You see, Kolya, a western person gets in the car and immediately buckles his seatbelt.” I couldn’t help but respond that I was just familiar with the way Russian cab drivers drive.

The weather on Sunday was perfect. Sunny, temperate, with yellow leaves all over the trees. Woke up very early, went downtown and took pictures of Red Square and other parts of Moscow. Went to church, met up with Dima Mikulin, an elder from my mission, from the Ukraine, now living in Moscow.

Monday was spent preparing for my presentation, registering my passport, meeting the program director at RSUH.

The conference began on Tuesday. We had a general opening session, then lunch. After lunch, I gave my presentation. Unfortunately, right when I got up, my colleague Nyusya’s eyes got really big as she motioned for me to wipe something off of my nose. Apparently, I had a big streak of pen ink that had somehow found its way onto my cartilage.

The presentation went well. It was definitely a growing experience.

The subsequent days of the conference were spent listening to several 20-minute lectures in Russian, some of which were very interesting. One led to a debate over whether the western educational system was better than that of the former USSR. I’m not sure how well received my capitalist comments were, but I made them none the less.

The conference ended and I found myself very bored on Friday. Saturday, a German kid on my floor and I went to the Tretiakov Gallery and saw some incredible Russian master works. The weekend was spent watching General Conference. Monday I returned home.

ETSU Open 2007

Yesterday, I participated in my second weightlifting meet. It was held at East Tennessee State University, about four hours from the Harrisonburg, VA area.

It was a very successful experience for several reasons:

1. Improved technique: When I attended my first meet in Hampton last March, I didn’t know that I wasn’t really doing Olympic lifts. I was power-snatching and power-cleaning, rather than doing the lifts authentically. The former involves pulling the bar for the catch in standing position (bad), while the latter involves pulling oneself under the bar for the catch in squatting position (good). At the earlier meet in Hampton, I power-snatched 60 kg. However, when I started training with Glen and Jeff in April and began learning the authentic lifts, I could hardly snatch the bar properly. Most of the time I spent training on O-lifts has been spent practicing the snatch and gradually working my way back up to 60 kg, meaning that I have made significant progress on the snatch.


2. Personal Record: In addition to improving on the snatch, I managed to apply my newly acquired technique to the clean & jerk and bump up my best C&J by 10 kg, resulting in a new PR. To see the difference between a real clean and a power clean, compare this C&J video with the one from Hampton (in my first blog entry…just scroll all the way down).


3. Higher Total: My total was higher than the previous meet. I was concerned that all the new technique was going to be too much to handle. Fortunately, not only did I not have to settle for anything less than my previous total, I exceeded it!

4. Mental Toughness: After years of stage fright as a trumpeter, I decided that I had had enough of performance anxiety. There’s a reason our minds and bodies respond to things chemically. When performance time comes, I’m going to be pumped full of adrenaline regardless of whether I choose to interpret it as excitement or fear. I might as well interpret it positively and ride it for all its worth!

One thing about this sport that I have noticed is that there is a lot of support from other people, even from those you have never met. It's wonderful to step onto the platform and have other people calling out words of encouragement. It doesn't matter that they don't really know you. They're just glad you're there and that you have the guts to try. They want to enable you. They want the best for you and you feel it. In case anyone thinks there is no teamwork in a sport as individual as weightlifting, the opposite is true.

Another positive thing that came out of this weekend is that I got to spend a lot of time with my buddy Dustin, who also came to see me lift at the Hampton meet. Not only did he operate the camera again, but he did a lot of the driving and dubbed himself my personal assistant, filled my water bottle, and brought me food. Not too many people would travel to another state with you for a weekend, let alone be so ready to serve. How lucky am I to have a friend like that?

Not only did I enjoy great personal success at the meet, I won third place in my weight category and was awarded an overwhelming cash prize of $3.00. I didn't go "downtown to the newspaper" for it, but I did travel to Tennessee. I told Dustin, "Wow! I'm practically a wealthy man, now!" He replied, "Yeah, if you lived in 1880!" Dustin says I should frame my $3.00. I think I will.

On the ride home, we put in some of our mileage on the Blue Ridge Parkway, which affords some incredible scenic views of the Blue Ridge Mountains. The only catch is that almost all the overlooks that had been built by the side of the road were blocked by huge trees. I try to be environment friendly, so please don't think that I'm not, but someone ought to prune those down! We ended up parking at the overlook and then walking along the road until the view cleared a bit for pictures. Virginia is still here, still beautiful, and still open for guests! Fall colors are just around the corner!

Poised and Ready

As some of you may already be aware, I'm traveling to East Tennessee State University this weekend for my second weightlifting meet. I'm not nervous, but excited to have fun, meet new people, and try my hand at competing again. I've learned a lot about this sport over the last six months and have made some good progress. I may not total much more than I totaled at the Cardinal Open in March...in fact, I may total a little less, but my form will be much better. I'll actually be snatching and cleaning, rather than power snatching and power cleaning. We don't have to go into the details about the difference, but just know that there is one. Maybe we'll have to post some before and after videos to compare. Or not...

If there's one thing I learned from playing the trumpet, it's not to push training before a performance or competition. So, I'm laying off the hypertrophy this week and keeping my routine really light: simply practice snatching and cleaning & jerking the way I'll be doing it at the meet.

In Town for the 4th

Every once in a while, the clouds of busy-ness part, leaving a window of time, and the opportunity presents itself to pack your bags and take a last-minute vacation. That's exactly what happened around June 20th of this year, when my colleagues and I were given five additional days off, an opportunity to fly out west presented itself, and I took it, just in time to attend...

Aerin's baptism! I told Dad that I was coming, but told him not to tell anyone else, so that it would be a surprise for Ellen when I showed up at their family function unannounced. Of course he didn't tell anyone ... except his other half, who didn't tell anyone ... except for Gilbert, who only knew that Grandpa had gone to Salt Lake to pick up a surprise visitor. Of course, Gilbert didn't tell anyone either, except his mom. Regardless of the leak, the surprise was still pleasant, Aerin's baptism was terrific, and we had a great barbeque lunch afterward. Good times.

There were leaks outside the family as well, mostly of my own make. When I emailed an old flame that I would be in Provo for the week of the 4th, I didn't think that the first thing she was going to do was go straight to my older brother's house and tell him. 'Next thing you know, Kirk called me and said, "I hear you're coming into town!" Anyway, kind of a humorous situation.

Of course the 4th of July also means the Provo Freedom Festival. My Dad, Bros, bro-in-law and several grandkids went on a hike to the Y to watch the balloon launch. That was an ingenious idea, by the way. It was a great morning and the mountain afforded a terrific view of the launch. Naturally, and in observance of family tradition, a hike to the Y meant that I had to announce to the world that "I'm at the tip of the arrow!" Unfortunately, the only people that would really understand what in the heck I was talking about weren't with us on the hike. The solution? Cell phones. A couple of quick calls, and before you know it, my announcement had reached all the way from Provo, Utah to Kensington, Maryland ... probably the farthest such an announcement has ever gone. It's a good thing that Ems and her family are two hours ahead of everyone in Utah, since the hike was pretty early, and I didn't want anyone to have to get out of bed for such an "important" announcement. I think Ellen was less fortunate than Emily in that regard. 'Sorry, Ellen.

While at the Freedom Festival, I attended the patriotic fireside and heard the Freedom Festival Wind Ensemble led by none other than Dr. David Blackinton, my trumpet teacher of 10+ years. It was good to see him. I told him what I was doing with my life, to which he of course chuckled and said, "Well, I'm glad you're successful!" He has a very colorful personality - 'highly recommend getting to know him.

Thanks to everyone who hosted Careen and me while I was in town. It was good to see everyone. 'Till our Christmas revels!

The Blackfriars Playhouse - Staunton, Virginia

I'll bet you didn't know that the little town of Staunton, VA is the home of the Blackfriars Playhouse, the world's only recreation of an indoor Elizabethan theatre (notice the English spelling of theatre - 'just comes out when I'm in a Shakespearean mood). I took a date there last Thursday. We saw A Midsummer Night's Dream. Before the production began, the players asked if anyone would like to sit not in the audience, but on the stage. A few people volunteered. Then they asked if anyone would want to occupy the balcony on the stage, the place where Royalty would have sat. My date and I volunteered. It was AMAZING!!!

Watching the play from up there gave me a new perspective on Shakespeare (I know, I know - Beylster, cut it out with the cruel and unusual PUNishment). After the play was over, we attended the "Talk Back" session, where we got to interact with some of the players. One of them asked how our experience was watching the play from the balcony, since they are the touring company and rarely get to have the audience sit on such a balcony. My response included the sentiments that sitting on the balcony really did make you feel like royalty. It made the production even more intimate. During the play, the players would look at and address us. During the curtain call, the players would turn around and bow to just us. It was a lot of fun.